[
Anonymous] here, compulsive overeater. Abstinent today because I weigh and measure three meals a day off the Greysheet, write them down, call them into my sponsor and don't eat in between no matter what. I am abstinent by the grace of God and through the support of this fellowship.
This morning I was asked to do the service of qualifying on a phone meeting. Doing this helped me SO much, to connect to the fellowship, and try to carry the message of recovery and share my experience, strength and hope, such as it is, in my first year of abstinence. To know that some of you can identify with my story reminds me I am who I am... and at "gut level" - pardon the pun, I, too, am one of you, and I must have what you have.
Greysheet abstinence is healing me on EVERY level:
body, mind and spirit. I started doing this, one day at a time, one year ago, coming in from a potentially fatal car accident that brought me to my knees in a carbohydrate pass-out... And on every level - doing what we do here: weighing and measuring off the GS without exception, calling a sponsor every day, learning to have total honesty and surrender around my food, learning to have integrity therefore.... I am healed of the following, for me, one day at a time:
- excess weight is gone
- light in the eyes is on, someone is home (me and I start to know who I am - really ) and I want to be there - in my own skin.
- depression is gone
- suicidal thoughts - gone
- fear, doubts and insecurity - diminished
- ability to be of service - increased
- ability to tell the truth to myself and others- increased
- ability to set boundaries - growing rapidly
- ability to feel : pain and joy / lots in between - know what it is and not need to act on every feeling: what a grace.
- sanity - growing! still nutty, but getting saner.
- a host of friends - all over the world - WITHOUT a doubt... I cannot believe the amount of friendships I have, true, honest ones - through the GS fellowship, even though I am alone in Belgium, only GS'er here.
- The joy of living. Self-respect. Ability to be present. Ability to listen.
Okay, you get the picture. I can go on and on. And this is only at 7-1/2 months of abstinence b2b, with a year of doing this deal to the best of my ability, one day at a time.
I am so grateful to be alive and to have the solution to my problem: body, mind and spirit. The food plan, the 12 Steps, the God of my understanding or lack thereof, the fellowship - the weighing and measuring without exception - together all of this heals me so profoundly. Surrender.
I never wanted to do GS - it looked like a prison sentence. Instead, it - for me - is the ultimate in freedom.... I am abstinent and I am finally alive.
Thank you all for supporting my abstinence. I am so grateful to you for helping me to keep this gift, one day at a time.
Love & respect and gratitude,
Anonymous
