In the beginning, in 1989 I went to meetings in NYC at least 4 times a week, but after years of struggle, including going through a lot of deaths in the family, I finally lost it completely, and learned that I had to surrender ALL THE PARTS OF MYSELF to this program. In 1998 after 1 year of back to back abstinence I married and moved here to Washington State where there are NO meetings really. So all those meetings I went to and LISTENED AND LISTENED AND LISTENED are still with me today. I have all those tapes too and listen to them frequently.